Love at Home

Love at Home

(Talk given by Crystal Snow on 9/16/07 in the WDC 2nd Ward)

There is beauty all around

When there’s love at home;

There is joy in ev’ry sound

When there’s love at home.

This past month I was blessed to return home to New Zealand for a couple weeks to attend my brother’s wedding and to celebrate my father’s 80th birthday. It was a rare occasion wherein my whole family- all 9 children, who are now spread out around the world, were once again together with my parents. We now range from ages 27 to 43 and five are now married with families of their own. I grew up on a 24-acre farm with a variety of animals and a huge 1-acre garden. Our farmhouse overlooks a bay of islands and just down the road is a beach where we would swim and play, and every so often, take the boat out for a spin. My Mum’s family immigrated to New Zealand from France and England in the early 1800’s and on our road lived many of my nana’s family- my great aunties and uncles and cousins. In many ways it was a storybook childhood. And yet, we had our problems too. We were far from perfect. We had our fair share of trials and we also did our share of arguing, fighting, and creating chaos for our parents. They were ever so patient with us as we complained about our never-ending responsibilities on the farm and in the garden. I could never understand why my friends thought it was the coolest thing to milk cows, feed pigs, or clean out the henhouse! I remember for a period of time absolutely hating my mother’s favorite hymn, which is “Love at Home,” as whenever things got really chaotic, she would have us sing it just before our nightly family prayer. Given the fact that no one was ever in the right mood and the words seemed incredibly unrealistic to our lives, I became really good at the art of “rolling my eyes.” My sister too would often change the words of the song in “I am a child of God” from “he has given me an earthly home, with parents kind and dear” to “he has given me an earthly home, with parents kind of weird!” In my mind, I thought my family was truly dysfunctional. I have since come to understand that every family is dysfunctional in some way or another.

However, during this past month’s trip, things were different. The evenings that we weren’t celebrating my brother’s wedding or my Dad’s birthday, were filled with meetings similar to Family Home Evenings where we played games, shared talents, and were taught again by my parents who took the opportunity to give us advice and to share their testimonies. It was a rare time where surprisingly, no one was fighting or arguing. In fact, the spirit abounded as we found ourselves sharing memories from years past and focusing on the many good times that we had experienced. Strangely, the difficulties, struggles, and trials of the past seemed to fade. Again, we sang together my mother’s favorite hymn…and this time there was no eye rolling!

In the cottage there is joy

When there’s love at home;

Hate and envy ne’er annoy

When there’s love at home.

I am so grateful for my parent’s efforts and sacrifices and for never giving up on us so that we could truly experience “Love at Home.” This past month’s experience has caused me to reflect on what I am doing now in my life to have “Love at Home.” It reminded me that being single and away from my family does not excuse me from working on having the Lord’s love in my home. In fact, this period in our lives is not a time to spend waiting, but a time to prepare and to cultivate habits that will make us strong and immovable in our testimonies when we do have families of our own.

In the evenings that we had with my parents over those weeks, my parents shared a lot of advice. In fact, my Dad gave so much advice that my brother suggested that he should write a book to contain it! But of course, there is already a book…or several books that contain it. They are the scriptures and the advice given comes from our Heavenly Father’s Plan for Happiness- a plan that my parents have tested and proven works. Today, I have chosen to share with you two pieces of advice that I have received from my parents which are the most meaningful to me.

Advice #1 is to “Put God First”

My parents made a decision before they were married that they would always put God first. They believe that this is what has carried them through their trials. The Lord, Jesus Christ, has promised blessings to those who put God first. He taught,

"Seek ye first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you."

How do we seek first the kingdom of God? The Joseph Smith translation of that verse provides us with further clarification-

“Seek not the things of this world but seek ye first to build up the kingdom of God, and to establish his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.”

Therefore, seeking the kingdom of God requires us to have the right priorities in life. It not only includes reading our scriptures, praying regularly and attending church. It requires a total commitment to the Lord. Indeed, the first great commandment is to “love Him with all our heart, might, mind and strength.” Putting the Lord first includes obedience to the Lord’s commandments through paying an honest tithe, obeying the Word of Wisdom, and living the law of chastity. It includes fulfilling our church callings, supporting the bishop, and following the prophet.

Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin stated that:

"When we love our Heavenly Father with all our heart, might, mind, and strength, we follow Him joyfully. When we love our Heavenly Father, we leave behind the begrudging “have to” attitude and embrace the enthusiastic “can’t wait to” attitude. In thanksgiving, we joyfully walk the path of the Lord—the path of discipleship—that leads to Him.

Why must we love the Lord? Because as we do so, we become refined, pure, and holy. When we love the Lord, the benefits of the Atonement can wash away our earthly stain. Though our sins be as scarlet, they can become white as snow (see Isaiah 1:18), and we can become new creatures, filled with new life, new thoughts, and a renewed desire to do good continually."

Seeking first the kingdom of God, includes my parent’s second piece of advice. Advice #2 is to serve others.

During His ministry on the earth, Jesus Christ spent His time serving and helping others. True disciples of Jesus Christ do likewise. The Savior said, “Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself”(Matt 22:37) and "By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another" (John 13:35).

When my parents first moved back to New Zealand, they walked up and down the road knocking on the doors of their neighbors. They introduced themselves and asked if there was anything that their neighbor needed. (I have yet to learn how to do this!) They invited each neighbor to attend a family history/games night to be held at their home on Thursday evenings. Anyone who wanted to work on their family histories could do so and anyone who just wanted to play board games could do that. People came and have continued to do so for a number of years now. It is amazing how many non-members want to do their family history! Numerous opportunities have arisen to serve these neighbors and those neighbors have also served my parents in return. Great friendships have formed. These evenings also gave my parents many opportunities to share the gospel. The greatest gift that we can give to our friends is the gospel of Jesus Christ! The Lord commanded us in Matthew 5:16 to:

“Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your father who is in heaven.”

In addition to doing missionary work, we can serve others by going to the temple and doing work for the dead. This past year I have had the opportunity to serve in the temple each Wednesday night and have gained a stronger testimony of temple work. It has not only been an amazing opportunity to serve others, but it has also reminded me of the great blessings of the Lord. All our work to have “Love at Home” is not in vain. I am so grateful for the temple that allows our families to be sealed together for time and all eternity. I know that the Lord knows and loves each of us and that this gospel is true. The covenants we make in the temple help us to put God first and to serve others. Obedience to His plan brings happiness in this life and in the life to come.

As my brother entered the sealing room of the Hamilton New Zealand temple with his soon-to-be wife, I watched as a content smile spread across my parent’s faces. They looked around the room at each of us, their 9 children, all worthy to be in the Lord’s holy house, and each, though not yet perfect, striving to keep their covenants. I now love my mother’s favorite hymn. It reminds me of our Heavenly Father’s deep love for each of us and how he desires to have each of us feel of His love again in His heavenly home.

“Oh, there’s One who smiles on high

When there’s love at home.”

In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.